There were nights that were unbearable

Thoughts were often melancholic

I find it hard to go through the day

Often tears end my day

I was a bitter child bruised and wounded

Because promises of forever

Were wasted and put in vain

I often found myself that true love was never meant for me

But somehow love found me

And that love came from you, my love

You are my salvation from Limbo
The life I thought would forever enthrall me with elusiveness

This world can sometimes be the saddest and loneliest place
But with you around
With you loving and caring for me
This world has become my paradise

If I could wrap you in my embrace forever
I will...
If I could love you in many lifetimes.
I will...
If I could dictate who my soulmate will be...
I will choose you..

You alone..
You forever...
You my love...

11072012 <2141>

"Anybody should be fine if it was just to ease loneliness
Because the stars in the night sky seems like falling, I cant lie to myself"

-One More Time, One More Chance (5 Centimeters Per Second)

It has been a few days after our break-up. Admittedly, I am still in a state of disorientation. I kept distracting myself by doing a lot of things during the day to exhaust myself and get some decent sleep.

I never imagined that it would feel this way. How painful the feeling would be. Thinking about you, draws me into tears.

I find it hard to hide the signs of sleepless nights of endless crying with people around me. I had to think of alibis.

Others might say, "why not just forget about it and stop the damn crying and move on?" But for me I find it much easier to cry than suppressing to myself the pain I feel.

I finally realized how much I have loved you, after everything we've been through.

I can't even look at you and say goodbye. I could not hold the tears. The pathetic me sobbed like insanity broke loose and my saving grace was the darkness in that jeep that enveloped me from the curiosity of the people around me. The exchange of messages intensified what I was feeling, I made it clear what was happening to me.

I felt you had the feeling of guilt as you tried to call and talk to me. I never answered the call because I was not ready at all to talk to you. I was still trembling at that moment.

When I had the guts to answer you, all I could hear were sobs.

You didn't want any of these things. You felt bad and worried about what I can do with myself.